


in an aeroplane high above the place (you finally left behind)

by chilledsunshine



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Academy Mentions, Canon until 2.19, F/M, Fitz's Perspective, FitzSimmons - Freeform, Gen, Stream of Consciousness, Written Prior to Season 3, and flowery writing!, and it's a short little drabble!, prose, re-posting from tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-03
Updated: 2015-12-03
Packaged: 2018-05-04 18:43:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5344547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chilledsunshine/pseuds/chilledsunshine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At twenty-seven, banker wasn’t ever on his resume.<br/>And if he was a gambler, he’d always loose.</p>
<p>[Did you know that sneezes could be romantic?]</p>
<p>(drabble)</p>
            </blockquote>





	in an aeroplane high above the place (you finally left behind)

**Author's Note:**

> hi! I posted this on tumblr a while back before the season 2 finale; so I think it's canon until 2.18. I wasn't going to publish it, but I had a moment of confidence from the lovely people who commented on my previous posts, so thank you for that! 
> 
> It's a little disjointed and roughly edited; it's a bit like each section could be it's own. Title comes from Set Yourself on Fire- by the Stars. Thank you for checking it out!

* * *

 

If you were a betting man, _which you’re not- you’re much more into empirical data,_ you’d bet that everything you’ve created and accomplished can be now be boiled down to a singular issue.

If all of your thoughts, prayers, sweat, and exchanges oxygen with carbon dioxide, leads to this- you’re entirely grateful.

Honestly, you’ve learned your lesson and paid your dues thrice and almost realized the consequences: keeping Jemma Simmons alive takes the upmost priority.

 

_(even over your own)_ _(especially over your own)_ _  
_

* * *

 There once was a story about a sneeze and Faraday Cup.

Did you know that sneezes could be romantic?

_no. no you didn’t._

retrospectively, if the traitor could speak, he’d agree.

* * *

 

_‘There’s nothing wrong with being afraid’_ is phrase that soaks the marrow of your bones and inflames your soul on even the warmest days.

A small voice of contention whispers in your ear that y _ou never wanted this, this flying circus._

A louder voice of compliance murmurs in your ears that _you’ve always just wanted to be by her damn side._

A shrill voice about three hundred days late shouts into the your mind _you couldn’t live if she doesn’t_ along with _she’s more then that_ and _you’ve been through this once before, do you think you’ll be lucky twice?_

 

Of course, you’ll be lucky twice: you’re an under-appreciated engineering genius. You’ve done the math and she can live, so her particles may remain the world’s best biochemist for a while longer. _(here? this qualifies as your life’s greatest achievement)_

 

_Your particles won’t mind being a monkey. Or maybe even a microbe._

 

* * *

So, there’s a myth of a boy legend and a goddess that haunts The Academy. 

The tale should’ve been wrapped in gauze and handled carefully.

Instead they’re statues in the minds of the very impressionable youth that dance into the chemistry lab, hoping to find the other half that Zeus divided from them. 

 

_I mean, it did happened once, right?_  

We all know lightning can strike twice. 

* * *

 

Compatibility is usually over simplified and categorized under the hyperbole of chemistry.

Chalk it up to murphy’s law and pure irony: you realize you’re in love in every single way, when static electricity is literary killing her and chemistry isn’t working.

 

_Fact: you’ve memorized more anti-serum procedures in the last year then even an expert at the CDC knows._

_Fact: even after waking up, the memories of all the components of the most effective anti-serums are still accessible._  

 

* * *

 

If there’s a survey on heartbreak, the consensus will include the following:

> _former lovers, almost lovers, current lovers_

by most of humanity.

 

Didya know that an _almost-well-er-was-he-ever-actually-your-friend_ > could break your heart and your lungs as well?

Adonis isn’t always basked with affection.

 

One time you wished you didn’t have join the flying circus, and you should’ve be careful: you’re leaving it behind.

 

* * *

 

Everything shifts at the bottom of the sea; the earth, the sand, your relation( _partner_ )ship,

You thought the exchanges rates on life where one to one.

 

You’ve never been a banker.

 

* * *

 

There’s a hollowness when you wake up, and a gape in your side when she disappears three months later.

There’s an apparition for another sixty-eight days until there’s real blood pumping in her arties.

_(You haven’t handled rejection well in the past. However, this isn’t a promotion. She risked dying to get away from you.)_

 

There’s a chasm in your chest that isn’t stitched together into your unknown miles apart, with her packing your bags enclosed with bakers twine and wax paper.

 

* * *

 

After a year of waking up with curled muscles and absent words, the revelation strikes: you don’t believe in fear. Your life isn’t the golden price that you’re terrified of losing.

Trust, however, that’s an excellent virtue. Yeah, you’ll believe in trust.

 

 


End file.
